Moving from Fear to Thanks to Trust.
"Nothing has materially changed
since yesterday's fears, last week's anxiety. But I have.
I'm changing. I am changing, deep changing, and I am giving thanks,
doing eucharisteo and eucharisteo is eureka
and I know why there's no fear and why had I never seen it before... Thanks
is what builds trust."
- One Thousand Gifts by Ann
Voskamp (Chapter 8)
A matter of perspective.
You decide how today goes, whether
you will embrace the fact that your very breath, today, is a blessing, or
choose only to see the life you wish you were living.
"Can God be counted on?
Count blessings and find out how many of His bridges have already held." -
One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp (Chapter 8)
This week, I finished One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. I started it last year after much coaxing from my mother. After coming back from India with eyes open wide to the little blessings, sort of like a "blessing high." My mom insisted I read this book.
opening my eyes to the blessings of
the everyday -
by unwrapping the "bad" to
be seen as good.
Ann helps us take the negatives and
learn to be thankful for them.
"Remember and give
thanks? For what? What if remembering doesn't kindle
gratitude? What if remembering just leaves third-degree burns?
The words sear. I know their
voices and remember their faces and sun from window glass, slants gold across
steering wheel. Eyes on the road, yellow line dashing like a line on hold,
I wait, just wait. In the wait, memories blister. And in the still,
Spirit comes and He whispers a name.
Christ."
- One Thousand Gifts by Ann
Voskamp (Chapter 8)
Memories are sometimes hard.
Mine are filled with mocking,
dishonesty...
Mine bring fear and pain...
"...In the dark the bridge and my world shakes cracking dreams..."
- One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp (Chapter 10)
Fear of inadequacy as a potential wife, career woman, and friend.
Pain from shattered promises of love, failed tests, and broken friendships.
What are your fears?
Where does your inner-pain come from?
Ann reminds us of God's way with
Moses, "'When my glory passes, by I will put you in a cleft in the
rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by. Then I will
remove my hand and you will see my back' (Exodus 33:22-23). Is that
it? When it gets dark, it's only because God has tucked me in a cleft of
the rock and covered me, protected, with His hand?"
 | |
| One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp (Chapter 10) |
That last question, why can't plans
gone wrong that brought pain be God covering us with His hand for something, or one, better for us?
Could those failed tests be building
perseverance for later down the road or opening your eyes to the doors God is
closing and new ones He is opening?
Can't those nasty remarks from peers be strength builders to love others well?
Looking back in my rearview mirrow, I see;
Protection from a relationship that was only distracting me from God, instead of
drawing me closer to Him.
Struggles that made me unafraid of facing the "unachievable" and unthinkable. There are "No's" so that I could see "Yes's" beyond anything I could of dreamed.
A broken spirit from hurtful words enabling me to empathize with someone before judging why their actions are as they are. To pour love into young girls who constantly hear all day "you aren't good enough." To show devotion even while being disregarded. To forgive 7 times 70 times, and to ask forgiveness even when I feel I deserve the apology.
Learning to become less, so He can
become more...(John 3:30)
"If the heights of our joy are
measured by the depths of our gratitude, and the gratitude is but a way of
seeing, a spiritual perspective of smallness might offer a vital way of seeing
especially conducive to gratitude."
- One Thousand Gifts by Ann
Voskamp (Chapter 9)
Learning to change my perspective,
be the servant, live thanks and give. Daily Thanksgiving. (Thank
you Ann.)
"Expectations kill
relationships."
"It is only when our lives are
emptied that we're suprised by how truly full our lives were."
- One Thousand Gifts by Ann
Voskamp (Chapter 9)
- One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp (Chapter 9)
I am excited to see who He desires, how He desires, what He desires to share with me.
I do not want to be like the man who hides his talent in the field afraid and angry with the master. Unable to see that the master had no need to even give the servant anything (Matt 25:14-28).
No, I want to take the talent and
share it with all, multiplying its worth.
Not forgetting to thank the
Giver.
That He may be pleased.
So that He can trust me.
And I may trust Him.
-Mark 4:8
"And I see a world through His
lens: "He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all - how
will he not also along with him graciously give us all things?" (Romans
8:32)
Goodbye fearful burns, thank you luscious Lord
for showing me how to trust you
more.
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